


Liar's Game

by QueenBumble



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Crock-pot, Disney Prince Kylo Ren, Escort Service, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Finn eats his feelings, I sprinkled something ABO in there but not enough to really tag it, I'll be honest I'm writing Gwen not Phasma, Kylo Ren is the guy your grandma loves, Kylo Ren loves his pet cactus, Moulin Rouge References, Phasma is all of us, Platonic Cuddling, Poe is Chaotic Good, Reysma bff, Serious thirst, Slow Burn, and emojis, first attempt at a slow burn, how could I not?, it's okay to wear sweatpants in an Applebees
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-01
Updated: 2019-07-08
Packaged: 2019-11-07 11:47:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17959889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenBumble/pseuds/QueenBumble
Summary: "Rey wants that promotion, and if she needs to hire a hot male escort named Kylo Ren she found in a Craigslist ad to be her fake fiance in order to get it, then so be it." A prompt from ReneeLovesReylo.





	1. An Engagement

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ReneeLovesReylo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReneeLovesReylo/gifts).



 

Monday, March 4th, 2019

 

How had she fallen so far? One minute she’s at her desk enjoying her morning cup of coffee; reviewing estimates for this month’s expenditures, the next, she’s sifting through r/dirtyr4r for an escort.

**30[m4f]#Chicago Daddy looking for bratty submissive**

**22[f4m] [California] on vacation! Looking for a good time.**

**Xpost from r/sexworkers:19[f4a]#Online DM me for prices and sc for tonights story ;)**

 

To say she felt dirty was an understatement.

 

“Did you find anyone?” Rey flinched so hard her phone was airborne and bounced off the partition wall. A moment too late she realized it was only her friend Phasma. She recovered her phone from the carpet, her amazon of a friend bent at the waist to remain in the privacy of her cubicle. “So?”

Rey let out a defeated sigh, “Phas, everyone on this hell-site sounds like they’re advertising for a bad porno.”

“What subreddit are you on?” The gorgeous bobbed blonde held out her hand and Rey trusted her with the phone.

“r/Dirtyr4r”

“Here, there’s an r/DirtyAtx4Atx so they may be cross-posted into- ah ha. Here.”

Phasma had searched ‘Escort’ in the sub and a never-ending page of escort posts appeared. Rey’s face was hot and she felt as if she had a hammer banging to the beat of her heart on the inside of her skull.

 

———————

 

It was all Hux’s fault. If it wasn’t for Ackbar retiring and Hux proposing, she would not be in this predicament.

Skywalker Technologies was one of the fastest growing companies in the United States. One of the reasons for this was that they were a wholesome family company that emphasized the importance of keeping life balanced. Working hard means playing hard and having a strong work family means having a strong family at home. Luke Skywalker and Leia Skywalker-Solo were the sibling powerhouse tag-team of the century. Luke was the creative mastermind and Leia excelled in politics and numbers. Where one faltered the other excelled. Both were in happy relationships and had successful children, none of which worked at the company.

No nepotism. No succession to the Skywalker legacy.

Which meant every peg on the ladder was fair game.

Rey thought hard work and determination would get her everywhere, and it did, for the most part. She and Hux were the Chief Accountants for the company, next in line for the position of VP of Finance (currently held by Gial Ackbar) and on paper she was by far the better candidate for a promotion. It wasn’t until Hux announced his engagement via Facebook and got a pat on the back by Luke himself that she realized how badly this might screw her.

Marriage is work. It’s a contract. Single employees were more distracted at work due to being on the lookout for a potential mate. They party and were more often the unreliable choice. Working married couples were more goal-oriented and less likely to leave a job.

At some point, other members of the office got up to congratulate Hux on his engagement along with their CEO but Rey kept herself hidden in her cubicle.

Luke grinned, “Just in time for the company retreat, too, I can’t wait to see what Mara thinks of your future bride.”

The scales started to lean in Hux’s favor.

Rey hadn’t had a date in months let alone a boyfriend. Hell, she didn’t even have a pet. Her social life consisted of infrequent movie nights with Phasma and her assistant Rose and going to sports bars with Poe and Finn every Sunday. Other than her visits to the gym before work and Sunday evenings with her friends she really didn’t go out in public. Which explains why her love life had fizzled into nothing.

How Hux managed to find someone to stand him for longer than a few hours, she had a few ideas. She sipped at her cooled coffee and texted the head of HR.

She heard a chime and popped her head over the wall to watch for a reaction.

**Rey: Do you think he pays her?**

Rey could see the most minute twitch in Phasma’s stoic expression. Smirking, she responded.

**Phasma: Like a sugar daddy?**

**Rey: No… maybe?**

**Phasma: Convenient he’s getting engaged in the same month as the retreat and Ackbar’s retirement.**

**Rey: Glad you said it. Do you think escorts have a ‘fiancé experience’? Lol**

**Typing… Typing… Typing…**

Rey peeked over the wall to see Phasma tapping the edge of her phone and then met her gaze. Rey’s phone chirped.

**Phasma: You should look into that.**

Confused, she replied:

**Rey: Prostitution?!**

Phasma’s lip quirked up at the accusation. She tucked her phone back into her skirt pocket and made her way back to her side of the building before Rey’s phone even went off.

**Phasma: A fake fiancé. For the promotion.**

 

—————

 

Phasma handed the phone back to Rey, “That first cross-post looks promising. Don’t you agree?”

It was another one from r/sexworkers:

 

**29[m4f]#AustinTX 6’3” Professional Escort**

**Chest: 44”**

**Waist: 34”**

**Bicep: 16”**

**Weight: 195 lbs**

**Athletic build**

**Prior experience in theatre.**

**Genuine desire to please and fall in love every evening.**

 

To the point with minimal cringe value.

 

“Measurements?” She looked hopelessly at her friend, “I’m lit’rly trying to rent a human being, right now, tell me this is wrong!”

A large manicured thumb and forefinger gripped her chin, “Rey, right now that lanky twat is schmoozing to anyone that’ll listen about how ready he is to settle down and start a family ‘like the family he’s found in the Skywalkers’. Luke and Leia are starting to see Hux in a ‘new light’ and if we don’t find you a fiancé before the retreat you are done. The escort was your idea and a damn good one so I want you to suck it up because if you don’t get this promotion because of a fuckin’ ring I am going _to be pissed_.”

Her hand dropped and Rey leaned back in her chair absolutely wrecked. Surely an escort wasn’t her only option.

“I could always ask a friend to be my fake fiancé.”

Unimpressed and annoyed Phasma held up her finger.

“Name one friend you have that doesn’t work here or date someone in this building.”

Another point to Phasma.

“Fine,” Rey huffed and unlocked her phone to send a direct message to the 44” chest with acting experience.

 

**U/StingRey**

**Hi, I’m not really sure how this goes but your post says you have acting experience and I need a date at the end of the month for a work event.**

Rey hit send before she had a moment to over-think it. She couldn’t believe what she’d just done and a manic smile cracked her composure.

“There. Messaged my first prostitute, are you happy?”

Phasma stood then, all 6’7” of her and her high heeled glory, “I’ll be happy when I see you with some arm candy at the end of the month,” her cool eyes crinkled at the edges before turning to make her way through the office.

Rey ran her palms over the stray hairs that were escaping her severely stressed bun before deciding to free her brown locks.

Her phone chirped.

 

**U/Rylo_Ken**

**Hello, StingRey, don’t worry too much, there isn’t a lot to it. If you’d like to pick a place in town you’re comfortable I’ll be happy to meet you so we can see if we’re a good fit for one another. If all goes well, from there we can discuss your expectations and my rates. How does that sound?**

 

Rey didn’t know what tone she’d expected from this man but calm reassurance wasn’t it. She could breathe (a little) again. Maybe meeting this stranger wouldn’t be as horrible as she thought.

 

**U/StingRey**

**That sounds great actually, thank you.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I'm not sure if this even made the cut but I desperately wanted to be a part of the exchange and found out about it a bit late! Thank you @fettuccine_alfreylo for the moodboard and being the best beta :)
> 
> A couple of things  
> 1\. This might become my longest fic, I fell in love with the prompt and have no intention of letting it go until I'm sated  
> 2\. Escort services have been removed on so many platforms and I only know how to work Reddit so... in my universe it's a safe place for sex workers  
> 3\. Are you ready to have some fun?


	2. An Arrangement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey meets Rylo_Ken at a coffee shop

Tuesday, March 5th, 2019

 

She figured coffee on Congress would be safe enough. Caffe Aragona was not Rey’s first choice, though. Nothing against the swanky shop, it was nice and modern with hardwood floors and a reasonably sized menu but she had seriously considered meeting Rylo_Ken at Finn’s Bakery a few streets over.  The owner (Finn) was her best and only friend who didn’t work at Skywalker Tech. He would’ve been happy to keep an eye on her and the stranger, ready at a moment’s notice to give Rey a fake emergency getaway route. The problem with that plan was that Finn would ask too many questions that would lead to him ultimately not approving of her plan. This would lead to him venting to his boyfriend Poe who was the VP of marketing at Skywalker Tech. She did not need an audience bigger than Phasma to watch her try and pull this charade off at the end of the month.

Rey checked the time— and quickened her pace, suddenly very glad she swapped her heels for flats. She’d parked in the garage nearest to the cafe but lunchtime traffic had slowed her down more than she anticipated. Rey bounced as she sped around the corner, the face of the shop making her heart rate skyrocket.

She could do this.

She was going to walk in there and pay a male prostitute with a history in theatre to pretend to be her fiance for a weekend. She was going to get the promotion she deserved and out-schmooze that son-of-a-bitch Hux.

Rey took a deep breath and tried not to jump at the door chime.

 

There were too many people. The bar to her right had a person on every stool, there was a body at every table, and a small line was forming at the register. She scanned the shop.

 

**U/StingRey**

**How about Caffe Aragona on Congress? Would lunch tomorrow be too soon?**

 

**U/Rylo_Ken**

**I’ve never been, and no not at all. Is one o’clock alright?**

 

**U/StingRey**

***thumbs up emoji***

**I don’t know why I sent that. Yes, one is more than fine.**

**How will I know it’s you?**

 

**U/Rylo_Ken**

**I’m fairly difficult to miss, but I’ll be wearing a blue and white plaid dress shirt.**

 

Rey turned in place and found the blue and white dress shirt at a table nearest to the front window. His sleeves were folded up past his forearms and he was hunched over reading something, his face obscured by a mop of black hair that curled at the ends.

“Rylo Ken?”

When he looked at her the erratic thumping in her chest slowed. She didn’t know where to look first. His eyes were brown and probably the least distracting feature of his. Moles were scattered across his pale complexion, his nose was long and angular like his chin and cheekbones— and his mouth. His mouth had a pair of rouge pink lips that were curling into a smirk before her.

The man looked younger with a smile, “Sting Rey.”

He closed the book he’d been reading and rose from his seat— and kept rising. ‘Hard to miss’ was right. He was huge. His measurements came to mind and Rey realized she never tried to imagine what he would look like. Twenty-four hours had passed and she assumed he was a classically handsome silhouette. The man before her was a giant sculpture of David.

“It’s lovely to meet you, my name is Kylo Ren,” Kylo’s hand extended toward Rey. His hand engulfed hers, strong fingers gently squeezing her hand and Rey was suddenly very warm.

“Rey Sansdotter, yo- uh- you are not what I was expecting.”

Kylo went rigid, his smirk twitched slightly and he let go of her hand, “Yeah? I guess I’m not everyone’s type.”

Panic washed over Rey, “Oh no no no! You misunderstand,” the small woman waved her hands in front of him, “You’re- not all guys are so- _pretty_ ”

Kylo’s eyes widened and a moment later a crooked-tooth smile took over his face, “I can honestly say, no one has ever called me ‘pretty’, thank you.”

A breath.

“Do you want to sit? We can get to know each other while we wait for the line to run its course.”

Rey nodded and hung her purse on the back of her chair to avoid toying with it. She ran her hands over her thighs before tugging at the knees of her slacks.

“So, Kylo, you’re really a…” She couldn’t make herself say it.

“An escort? Yes, ma’am.”

“What turned you on to this profession?”

Kylo scratched at his jaw, “Well, my mother was a stripper and my father was her pimp so I guess it runs in the family.”

Rey’s face paled only to be saved by Kylo refraining from a laugh, “Rey, I’m kidding.”

“That’s so not funny.”

He tried to frown through his grin, “It was a little funny,” and met her glare then sighed, “I grew up wealthy with an attitude problem, channeled that into an aggressive career I didn’t really like, worked out my emotional baggage and found out I really like pleasing people. Business in pleasure gives me a greater sense of… job satisfaction.”

Rey hummed. It made sense to some extent.

“What is your normal clientele pool like?”

Kylo’s head bounced from side to side, “Bored housewives and young widows mostly. There’s the occasional outlier like businesswomen who don’t have time to date or who have men in their lives who don’t listen to them.”

“How often do you have clients who don’t want you for sex?”

“I’ve been told I’m a pretty amazing cuddler.”

Rey couldn’t help but crack a smile that Kylo happily reciprocated.

“I’d say about one out of five just want me as a companion for an innocent date or an event. Often enough.”

She nodded and her eyes drifted to the neighboring tables food. She hadn’t eaten anything since her banana and oats that morning.

“Do you want to get in line? I’m starving.”

 

They had arrived at the tail-end of the lunch rush so tables were starting to empty and stools were left unattended at the bar. Kylo and Rey both chose a panini and a coffee, Kylo had an iced caramel macchiato with almond milk and sugar and Rey chose black coffee with a single packet of sugar from the table. He insisted on paying since his coffee was more expensive than either of their sandwiches. Rey could feel his heavy presence behind her when they walked back to the table and he even pulled her seat out for her.

Rey had a mouthful of panini when he kick started the conversation again.

“What do you do for a living?”

She almost teared up from trying to swallow a much too large bite,“I am the Chief Accountant at Skywalker Technologies. Actually, I’m one of the two. And we are competing for a promotion. That’s actually why I need you. I need you to play the part of my doting fiance at a company retreat.”

“You need a fiance for a promotion? Seems a bit out of the ordinary,” Kylo sips at his cup of sugar.

“I’m great at my job but our mission statement is that a balanced life is a good life. Right now my colleague is currently winning in terms of balancing work and play.”

“Ah, okay, so tell me about the retreat.”

“It’s an annual event where the office goes to a resort out on lake Buchanan for the weekend. It’s the last Saturday and Sunday of this month. We take pictures in the bluebonnets and do team building exercises and whatever else the Skywalkers think will boost morale.”

Kylo took the last bite of his panini and dusted his hands over his plate.

“So, if you want me, I definitely think we could convince everyone you know how to play,” Rey watched him stir his sad excuse for a coffee, “But are you wanting sex or anything of that nature from me?”

Rey couldn’t help the blush that warmed her face before sipping her drink and shaking her head, “You seem really nice, but no. Paying someone to help me lie to my friends and coworkers for a promotion is easier to stomach than paying someone to lie about how much they like me.”

Kylo nodded then leaned forward, his gaze locked on Rey. She noticed his eyes weren’t actually brown but had hints of green along the edges.

“Rey, this is my job, but I pick my clients. If I didn’t like you a great deal already, we wouldn’t have made it this far in the conversation. So, don’t worry about me, I would be a more than willing participant.”

Rey’s mouth was _wet_. She'd never given much thought to how damp her mouth was until whatever part of her brain that regulated it went on the fritz at that moment. She just blinked at him as her blush reddened from her cheeks down to her chest. She was salivating. Drooling, almost, if her lips hadn't been clamped shut in a fine line.

Kylo leaned back in his chair with a soft smile, “But that’s only if you decide you want anything to happen, otherwise, I’ll stick to doing whatever you say during those team building exercises.”

“That… would be preferable. Thank you.”

Kylo nodded once.

“So, do you have a flat rate or do you go,” She hesitated, “hourly?”

“I don’t really do hourly. In my experience female escorts do hourly or ‘acts’ just because they can show up, get the job done, and aren’t expected to stick around. I usually do dates which would be around four hours, or twenty-four-hour periods. I usually plan a scene or there’s an expected dynamic to follow. A normal weekend with sex would be about three thousand a day. Not including travel expenses. I’ve never had a weekend planned that didn’t end in sex so, for you, I’d say it would be fifteen hundred a day.”

Rey thought that was extremely reasonable. After mulling it over for a day she came to the conclusion that this was an investment in her future.

“I’ll pay you the six thousand for the weekend. And I’ll double it if we manage to pull this off and I get the promotion.”

Kylo did a long blink, “If that’s the case we’re going to need to get to know one another better.”

He opened the book he’d been reading before Rey arrived and pulled out an index card. He pulled a small bullet shape out of his pocket before opening it as well and putting the cap on the end, it was a pen, and jotted his number down.

He wasn’t that much older than her, but Rey felt that the gesture dated him. People then would pull out their phones and exchange numbers but no, Kylo Ren had index cards and a pen on hand.

What was that book he had?

Kylo held the card out for her, “You can call or text me anytime, but I would prefer if you didn’t call before nine AM because I’m more of a night owl. I do check my voicemail as well so if you can’t get a hold of me for some reason, I will call back as soon as I’m able.”

Rey thumbed over the inked number, “A night owl, huh? Alright. I can also find some homework for us so we can get come up with a story for us as a couple. Shared history and all that.”

“If you just want to come up with a character I could easily slip into that.”

“I mean, all the best lies come from a kernel of truth, yeah?”

Kylo sucked down the last of his drink before brushing a thumb over his plush lower lip.

“Lies sure, but I’m a bad liar. Acting is different. I believe in every role I play. That’s what makes me such a good escort.”

Rey remembered the last line of his post on reddit. **“Genuine desire to please and fall in love every evening.”**

Did he really think he could fall in love every evening? She guessed if he believed himself to be someone that loved them then maybe. It sounded lonely.

“I’ll see what I can come up with then,” Rey cleaned her hands with a napkin and then dusted them over her slacks for good measure. She pointed to his book, “May I? I’ve been so curious.”

He handed it over, resigned to her probable reaction.

“The Philosophy of Doctor Who: Bigger on the Inside,” Rey smiled, “You’re a geek?”

“I resent that statement,” Kylo chuckled and snagged his book back, “I just like to read. Don’t care what.”

Interesting, Rey thought.

 

Rey’s phone beeped, her signal that she’d already been there for an hour and her lunch break was coming to an end. She was almost disappointed her lunch ~~date~~  meeting was coming to a close.

“That’s my cue. Kylo, I’m pleasantly surprised with how well this went.”

Kylo stood and gathered his things to walk out with her. He offered his hand for her to stand and she took it with only a slight hesitation. They exited together and as they were about to part ways Kylo remembered, “We kind of skipped over this because of the rest of our conversation but, we do need to see each other once more before the retreat weekend. I require all my clients to get tested and I do as well, so we can trade before the night of, in case you change your mind last minute. Better safe than sorry.”

Rey frowned. That wasn’t something she was looking forward to doing, and although it wasn’t applicable to her case, it wasn’t unreasonable.

“I’ll text you whenever I get my results back, okay?”

Kylo seemed a bit more than pleased that she immediately agreed. That must’ve been a snag in conversation with other clients. Rey thrust her hand out between the two of them, going for a farewell shake.

He enveloped her hand under his own, “We’re going to get you this promotion, Rey.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> KYLO REN ENTERS FROM STAGE RIGHT  
> I'm having such a good time writing this and I hope that comes across while you're reading.  
> No moodboard for this chapter but I'm working on a playlist to release once this is no longer on anon.  
> "Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy" by the one and only Queen was my inspiration for this chapter :)


	3. A Plan to Plot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Button smashing, everyone is getting engaged, and the Phasma x Rey bromance continues.

 

 

Tuesday, March 5th, 2019

 

Rey made it back to work feeling lighter than before. She was taking initiative. An adult who was outsourcing her needs to another capable adult. A woman getting shit done. Her flats were rolled up in her purse and a ghost of a smile still played on her lips when she entered the lobby elevator. She was headed straight to Phasma’s office to thank her and brainstorm a game plan. 

“Hold the lift!” 

Oh, fuck no, Rey recognized the accent. Alone in the elevator, she figured she could get away with pushing the ‘close door’ button a few dozen times. No dice. 

Armitage Hux kicked a spindly leg between the closing doors. Rey jumped to the back corner of the elevator and made an effort to look busy on her phone. The doors pulled back and the lanky redhead entered.

“Sansdotter.”

“Hux.” She didn’t look up. Hux shifted his footing as they began to ascend.

“Figures you of all people would hit the exact opposite button I asked you to press.”

Rey looked up to see he was holding a flat white box in one hand and a coffee in the other. Her poker face held a shit-eating grin at bay. 

“I think you’re mistaken, and I’m a little offended you think so poorly of me.”

He looked bored, eyes glazed over at her lie, “You could hear the frantic clicking from the lobby, you reclusive shrew.”

 

Rey didn’t know what made her bristle more: getting caught or the name calling. She’d hit that button like she was flipping through channels on her family’s old CRT television and was turning red at the thought of him knowing just how much she didn’t want to be in that fucking elevator with him.

She could go over the list of things to be annoyed with herself for, later. 

"I am not a reclusive shrew."

"So you say," another few floors passed them by and Rey stewed. A recluse wouldn’t have friends or planned weekly outings with said friends. Hux didn’t know a damn thing about her. How dare he make such assumptions when he didn’t make any effort to have friends in the office. 

He interrupted her train of thought, "Do anything for lunch?"

Rey thought about what she had actually done for lunch. _I_ _  planned your demise with a terribly handsome escort. _  Her lip quirked up. As fun as it would’ve been to see his reaction to her being on a date, she decided to keep that under wrap until she was ready to answer more questions about her faux engagement. 

"I ate at home," Hux smirked and said nothing. He watched the floor numbers change and Rey’s smile disappeared when she realized her answer merely solidified his point. 

_ You’re only upset because you think it’s true. _

Rey repressed the unnerving thought and tried to regain a sliver of her original good mood as the elevator slowed to a stop. Rey made a beeline for Phasma’s office. 

 

——

 

The long-legged blonde sat on the edge of her desk, gnawing at her finely manicured thumbnail. She had listened attentively as Rey recounted her meeting with the surprisingly wholesome escort and was silent after. Rey watched as Phasma’s leg bounced over her other knee. 

“So? What do you think?”

Phasma pulled her thumb out from between her teeth, “From how you’re describing him, darling, I’m hoping you sleep with him anyways. You _are_  paying for it, might as well get some.”

“I don’t need ‘some’ and I definitely don’t want to pay for ‘some’,” Rey pulled at her face, reddened at the thought of Kylo being a ‘more than willing participant’. 

“Everyone pays for it. If not money then time, energy, and spirit are the other currencies you’d be playing with and none of those are any fun. This gentleman probably knows how to hit every spot-”

Rey clapped her hands together like a fidgety applause, “N-no no no no no!”

Phasma grinned at her thoroughly embarrassed friend. Rey’s head shot up, a stressed smile pulled the edges of her mouth past her teeth and she stood up to walk around and lean on the back of the chair she’d been in.

“What I _do_ need is to come up with a background for us. This was your idea. Will you help me please?”

Rey thought in that moment that Phasma’s smile resembled Dr. Seuss’s Grinch grin. In hindsight, she should’ve been a little frightened. 

“I will most definitely help you. What did you say his name was again?”

“Kylo Ren. His reddit username is just the first letter of his first and last name swapped which seems like it would fairly easy to doxx him so I don’t understand why he did that…”

Phasma sauntered to the other side of her desk and sat in her too-extravagant-for-the-office chair. 

With a series of knocks on the door, a tan curly-headed fellow popped into the office. 

“Hey guys, just wanted to let you know that Hux brought back kolaches from that little Czech shop we all love. They’re in the kitchen.” 

That white box he’d been carrying had been treats for everyone. Rey squinted and side-eyed Phasma who voiced the same distrustful thought.

“Poe, don’t you think it’s a bit out of character for Hux to do something nice like that?” 

He shrugged and forced a smirk, “The guy’s getting married. He’s been promised sex with someone he loves until he’s a geriatric. If he wants to share that love with us in the form of baked goods, I’m not going to question it.” 

The thought of Hux actually getting laid made Rey’s nose twitch and lip curl, “I don’t think that’s most people’s motivation for getting married.”

He gave both women a look that screamed, _"I know something you don’t know."_

“Well, that’s why I’m going to marry Finn. So have fun with whatever, I’m getting kolaches!” And he was gone. 

 

Rey was speechless. She turned around to see a Phasma flicking her eyes from the door back to her computer. 

“Everyone is getting engaged in March apparently.”

“Apparently…I’m going to go back to my cubicle, um, can we- we’ll plot on Friday? Feel like skipping movie night?” 

Phasma was chipping the paint on her thumbnail, “Rose already has plans that night so that works out splendidly.” 

 

——

 

Friday, March 8th, 2019

 

Rey followed Phasma’s car off of US-183 onto 29 as they made their way into Liberty Hill. Population: 1,905. Home of the Panthers. And Kathryn Phasma. As chic as she was at work, no one would guess that she commuted an hour to and from just so she could live in one of the small outer cities. She had grown up in a small farming village in the UK before going to University, working in Brighton, and moving to the states. For all it was worth, she was a country girl at heart. 

They turned onto the dirt road that led to her home and Rey watched as Phasma sped down the road. The wheels of her Saturn Sky churned up dust that finely coated Rey’s already filthy Mini-Cooper. Twenty feet to the left, behind a wooden fence, a horse ran parallel to Phasma. They were racing home. 

She was already greeting her horse through the fence when Rey sauntered up the driveway with her overnight bag. 

“Cookie, you’re looking limber as ever,” Rey nodded at the black and white mare. In the front entryway stood a tired, one-eyed, balding Boston Terrier wearing a pink bandanna. 

“And Miss Crumb, you’re still aging like milk, I see.”

“DON’T YOU BE MEAN TO MY BABY!”

Phasma stomped over the stone steps with unmatched grace and scooped up the old-as-dirt-dog, cradling her like a wrinkly infant. 

Rey’s smile was bright and teasing, “Oh, come on, she knows she’s my favorite. If I didn’t love her I wouldn’t make fun of her,” Rey scratched under Crumb’s chin but was only met with her bored expression and a groan. 

Phasma rolled her eyes, “Running with that logic we should be head over heels for Hux.” 

Rey grimaced, “You couldn’t help but say that could you?”

It was Phasma’s turn to laugh. She turned into her home, and Rey followed. 

The high ceilings and windows made the much too large home feel even bigger. Phasma’s estate was a five bedroom, four full bathroom custom home sitting on four acres of land with no neighbors in sight. She lived alone save for her pets: Cookie, a black horse with a white blaze, Crumb, her rescued Boston Terrier, and a slew of colorful (and neutered/spayed) barn-cats that Rey could never keep the names straight on. 

The evening sun poured into the living room, turning the carpet and walls a welcoming orange hue. Rey toed off her flats and kicked them to the entryway wall next to Phasma’s heels. She placed her overnight bag on one of the stools huddled under the lip of the breakfast bar and made her way to the fridge. 

Rey was shaking the contents of a family-sized frozen dinner of Voila: Sweet and Sour Chicken into a pan when Phasma brought up the topic of the night. 

“So, tell me again what he looks like?” 

“He’s very very tall and very broad. Pale skin with dark freckles or moles everywhere. Black hair that’s past his ears…brown eyes and an angular face.” 

She turned around when Phasma didn’t say anything and the woman was glaring at her.

“What?” 

“You sounded as if you were reading your grocery list! What happened to all that excited energy from Tuesday?”

“I-I dunno?! I saw him once, talked to him once, got used to the memory I— guess?” 

Phasma’s long bare nails clicked on the granite counter-top, “You have his number right?” 

Rey’s spine popped as she extended her back in discomfort.

“Yes, I’m supposed to call when I get my test results back from my doctor.”

The clicking stopped, “Wha- SO YOU ARE GOING TO SLEEP WITH HIM!”

“ _NOO_ God, it’s just a precaution-”

“-In case you decide you want to sleep with him.”

Rey’s lips curled back between her teeth and she bit down, making a face. 

“Fuck. Yeah in case of that. _But that isn’t happening._  So, why do you want to know about me having his number?”

“Oh, I want a picture of him.”

Rey’s face burned and she tried to convince herself the heat was from their dinner she was stirring.

“Can I even…ask for those?”

“I’m sure it wouldn’t hurt to ask. Hell, if he wants to charge you for them I’ll give you the money.”

“And why would you do that?”

“I can’t help you write a believable story if I don’t know what the character looks lik-”

“I just told you-”

Phasma shushed her, “No no no. The passion is gone, and your sense of…romantic creativity is God-awful. Let’s just ask for pictures.”

Rey turned the burner off and spooned the sweet and sour chicken onto two plates. 

“‘Romantic creativity’ Who the hell are you and where is my best friend?” 

Phasma traded Rey a fork for her dinner and they passed the dining room and breakfast bar to eat on the floor in the living room. 

“I’m just saying, you’re going to have to get creative. You’re pretending you’re engaged to an escort in front of dozens of people who need to believe it’s real. If you talk about your fiance like he’s a collage of body parts, no one is going to believe you.” 

They ate in silence as Rey toyed with her phone. Her thumb grazed over Kylo’s contact.

 

**Rey: Hey this is Rey from lunch on Tuesday… Are you around?**  
  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ACRES: in case you’re like me and can't visualize numbers/distance very well, one football field is about 1.3 acres so Phasma’s home is cushioned by about 3 football fields.
> 
> I'm sorry it took me so long to update, I'm going to try and do better for you guys.  
> All the comments have been such a joy to read they truly make my day and fuel me when I struggle to put pen to paper. 
> 
> Do y'all like the new moodboard :heart_eyes: the lovely @fettuccine_alfreylo made it for me :) I can't thank her enough.. but I can highly recommend you read her stuff on here if you haven't already (Bespoke anyone??) 
> 
> I also have a playlist I've made while writing if anyone is interested in some of the music that inspired these characters/this story [you can find it here](https://open.spotify.com/user/kiwibumblebeebunny/playlist/18MQJlfjMvJfZXuC5EP2ul?si=ozJi-MukSJagl14hRraAhw)


	4. A Character Created

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey doesn't ask for nudes  
> Phasma has a secret  
> And sometimes your best friends accidentally turn you on... what're you gonna do.

 

Friday, March 8th, 2019

 

“Okay, there,” Rey tossed her phone onto the carpet between her and Phasma, “He’s probably busy Friday nights so I wouldn’t expect much.”

Crumb’s toenails clicked on the kitchen tile behind them, no doubt looking for scraps of fallen food. To Rey’s dismay, her phone chimed. Phasma cackled and her hand shot out, grabbing the phone before Rey could do so much as flinch at the sound. At that moment, she immensely regretted her decision to not put a lock on her phone.

“Like I could ever forget my fiancee, what can I do for you?” Phasma read Kylo’s response in a low breathy voice. Rey wanted to evaporate.

“Look at him, already playing the part,” she shoved the phone in Rey’s direction, the woman giddy with the possibilities.

“Tell him what he can do for us, Rey!”

Oh God, Rey nearly groaned. She chewed the inside of her cheek while she typed.

**Rey: lol I’m with my friend who’s going to help come up with our backstory and your character tonight. She wants to know what my partner in crime looks like. Would you mind sending me a picture of yourself?**

His response was immediate.

**Kylo: Are you asking me for nudes?**

“Jesus Christ, Phas, YOU DID THIS.”

Phasma hastily dropped her plate on the carpet (as an offering to the wandering Crumb) and probably had skid marks on her ass from how quickly she scooted next to Rey. Her eyes widened.

“yyyES!”

Rey attempted to push her horn-dog friend to the side but only managed to shift herself.

“No!”

Another chime.

**Kylo: Rey, I’m only kidding :)**

**Kylo: Are you wanting professionally shot or a bathroom mirror selfie?**

**Rey: Are you saying you’ve done photoshoots?**

**Typing… Typing… Typing…**

Rey mumbled, “It’s a yes or no question why is he-”

“Oh-ho-holy hell,” Phasma’s laugh felt like a sob. Kylo sent three photos. The first didn’t even look like the man she’d met earlier that week. It was a black and white photo of him in a bathtub wearing a tank top that left zero to the imagination. He had a goatee and his hair was slicked back instead of curled. In the second, he was holding a cinder-block over his shoulder poised to throw, in black sweatpants and a fitted dark grey sweater. The curve of his back and thighs made her salivate like before. And in the third, he was bent forward in a sweater with the top four buttons undone and a waistcoat. His hair perfectly curled away from his smirking, clean-shaven face.

Rey’s mouth popped open, her tongue firmly suctioned to the roof of her mouth when she looked at Phasma— who seemed just as shaken at the variation.

They didn’t even react when the phone chimed again and another picture downloaded. The fourth was just of his face, illuminated by a lamp out of frame, grinning ear to ear. He’d decided to send a selfie anyway.

**Kylo: Will those do?**

“Phasma,” Rey pressed her chin into her own shoulder to look at her friend as she dripped with sarcasm, “will those do?”

The giantess delicately poked Rey’s phone and scrolled back up to the bathtub photograph.

“This one is definitely doing something.”

Rey recoiled, her mouth open in mock disgust as she laughed.

 

**Rey: They’re more than enough, thank you, Kylo**

**Kylo: I’m here to please. Text if you need anything else :)**

 

Rey saved the pictures to her phone. Phasma picked up their licked-clean plates and placed Crumb on the couch where the little dog rolled onto her side.

Phasma’s eyes were wide and her grin took up most of her face.

“Rey…you little minx, he looks like a Grecian God. He could be on the covers of harlequin novels,” she tiptoed quickly into the kitchen and abandoned the plates in the sink, “I want to show you something.”

Phasma all but pranced up the stairs to her library, “Come here!”

 

Rey reached the top of the carpeted stairs to see Phasma gently laying an armful of paperback books across her home work desk.

“How about we start you off with an archetype to choose from and we build your promotion-worthy-dream guy from there.”

Rey scanned the books, all with suggestive titles with shirtless, excessively ripped men on the covers. She blinked incredulously. _Her best friend: head of human resources at Skywalker Technologies, was a connoisseur of pornographic romance novels._

 

“Phasma, have you read all of these?”

Rey turned to the wall of bookshelves at her back to see Phasma had only taken half the books off one shelf. At a glance it looked like an entire floor to ceiling shelf was nothing but thick paperbacks like the ones laid out before her.

Phasma was beaming, “I’ve done more than read them, Rey.”

Rey pinched the bridge of her nose and tried not to laugh, “Oh my God with this much smut I guess you would do more than just read-”

“Rey, you’re misunderstanding, look,” she held up a novel with a man in a loin-cloth titled _Gentle Barbarian_  in romantic script. She pointed to the bulky font underneath. **Gwendoline**.

Rey squinted, not willing to believe it. All the books had the same print, in the same place, on every cover. She dared to think that the entire bookcase behind her was also filled with novels by the same author.

Rey’s jaw dropped and tears pricked her eyes from the stress of containing her absolute merriment at this new development in their friendship.

“Kathryn _Gwendoline_ Phasma, you absolute mad woman.”

Phasma clapped her hands together— obviously thrilled at the reaction she earned.

“I’ve wanted to tell you for a while now but it never seemed a decent time to brag.”

“You never found a way to sprinkle in the fact that you’ve written porn professionally?”

“Well, hold on it’s not porn, it’s erotica. It’s romance.”

 

Rey snagged a random book off the table and flipped to a page nearing the middle of the novel.

“Krishna grips his sandy hair and pulls, baring his throat to her. Fletcher moans as her teeth graze the,” Rey faltered, “ _pulsing_  gland under his ear. Krishna feels his almost full,” and again she hesitated, “ _knot_ slide against her slick.”

Rey slammed the book closed, her face contorted, “I have no idea what the fuck I just read but it felt porny.”

 

Phasma nodded, fingernail in her mouth again, “I don’t know where to start with that book but, sure, yes, I write porn when I’m not working. It’s my only creative hobby.”

 

“So, when I told you Kylo wanted me to make a character for him-”

 

“I think he’s a genius. An escort with acting history is a gold mine,” Phasma was talking with her hands as they hovered over her books, “if he had any friends like him they could go into business and call it Build-a-beau.” Phasma couldn’t keep a straight face as she reached the last few words.

 

“Oh, my God, have you been holding on to that since Tuesday?”

Her blonde hair bobbed as she nodded, finding her joke much funnier than Rey did. She caught her breath and sighed, “So archetypes, Kylo looks like he could play just about anything with that photography portfolio. What kind of fiance do you want him to be?”

 

Rey tried to imagine the kind of man she’d want to end up being old and grey with. She couldn’t think of anything and that made her more sad than anything.

“Can you tell me the archetypes first?”

“So, there is the chief: a control freak with expectations he wants met, a warrior: like the chief but he’s a control freak for the sake of others and wants to be the hero, the bad boy: charismatic and smart but pessimistic and volatile, the charmer: creative and witty but manipulative, the best friend: the team player who just wants the heroine to be happy even if it’s not with him, the lost soul: tortured and emotional but he loves deeply and will be redeemed, the professor: smart and sexy but an introvert who needs to get in touch with his emotions, the swashbuckler: kind of like the bad boy but he wants thrill and to feel everything life has to offer but he’s usually selfish, and…I think that’s it.”

Rey felt like her brain had blue-screened.

“You’ve been writing for a very long time haven’t you.”

“Much too long,” Phasma tapped her fingernails on the desk, “so did any of those pluck a chord in you?”

Rey’s eyes widened as she shook her head at the carpet, “Hell, I guess the best friend is all I’ve really been with before.”

“Yeah, that worked out well,” Phasma dragged, “but you know that dynamic well enough so, why not.”

Phasma walked around Rey, pulled out the desk chair and gestured for her to sit. Phasma leaned against the desk and pulled out her phone and began vigorously typing.

“What are some hobbies you have in common with your dream man?”

Rey thought about her hobbies, the shelves of movies under her tv at home.

“We would both really like movies and binging tv series.”

“Homebodies…ok. How did you two meet?”

Homebodies was right. She didn’t go out except with friends and when she wasn’t with friends she-

“Oh, um, well, we could say we met at the Alamo Drafthouse on Slaughter? Last…December? He hasn’t met any of my friends yet so is three months too long to keep a dating thing private?”

Phasma shrugged.

“Anyways, we both were seeing Princess Bride and he saw I was upset during the movie and asked if I was alright and if he could sit next to me. We finished out the movie and he took me for coffee after.”

Phasma picked at her lip, eyes narrowed at Rey. She looked disturbed.

“What?”

“Rey, do you go see movies alone?”

“I mean,” She answered shamelessly, “only the ones I know no one wants to see. I’ve seen Spirited Away and The Princess Bride more times than I can count.”

“In theaters?!”

Rey gave a curt nod. Phasma blinked and scratched her head before typing in her phone again.

“That is so fucking sad sounding. Alright, you bond over coffee and movies.”

“Oh! He’s a nerd! He had a Doctor Who philosophy book.”

Phasma was jotting down notes. “He brought a book to your lunch meeting?”

“Yeah— so maybe he actually is into tv.”

 

Rey and Phasma kept at the questions until they had a full profile to give to Kylo.

 

Rose never showed up, she texted around 8 to tell them her date went better than expected and to start the movie without her.

 

They began with Happy Death Day and then switched gears when the late night second wind of energy hit them and they opted for Moulin Rouge. Phasma sang all of Christian’s parts and Rey channeled her inner Satine. After their emotional duets left Miss Crumb unimpressed, Phasma konked out around _Roxanne_. Leaving Rey glassy eyed, her best friend snoring alongside her dog as Christian threw his money at Satine. Right before she collapses and takes her final breaths in his arms.

 

The large woman slept, curled up, her head on Rey’s abdomen with Rey’s leg wrapped over her hip. Rey ran her fingers through her friend’s hair and sighed when she realized she couldn’t move to change DVDs. She settled for lowering the volume and then hit play when the title screen popped up again.

 

Sleep wasn’t easy. She thought about the list of traits she would be handing over to Kylo come the next week and she cringed. Would he find her as boring as other people did? Why did his opinion matter to her? Surely a simple fantasy like this wouldn’t be much of anything for him to do, he’d seemed nice enough. All he could do is act like himself, like he had at the coffee shop, and have similar answers to questions and that would be it.

She remembered how she’d drooled when he’d said he’d be _more than willing_ to please her. She imagined him in the wet tank top he’d sent a picture of himself in earlier. The way his sable waves would feel between her fingers and how large he was. She thought of how it would feel to be under him, her hips pinned to a mattress by his own hips digging into her. The way he’d move over her. She moaned.

“Rey.”

Rey’s eyes shot open and she immediately regretted it. Sunlight blinded her and when she flinched, throwing her arm over her eyes, she realized she could move her legs again. Phasma’s comatose body had been the one pinning her to the couch, then shifting to get off of her moments ago. She groaned, not wanting to think about how she’d gotten wet imagining Kylo (a person she shouldn’t have been thinking about) holding her down with weight that wasn’t even from his body, but belonged to her best friend. Ugh.

Phasma was bending this way and that, trying to pop her back, and strained a laugh, “Good morning to you too sunshine.”


	5. Game Start

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poe goes full Kris Jenner "You're doing amazing, sweetie," in his favorite Applebees, Finn is not amused, and Kylo starts The Question Game with Rey.

Sunday, March 10, 2019

Rey pulled into the parking lot of Poe’s favorite Applebees. It was inching very close to 6:45 with tip-off at 7 meaning Finn had probably just put in their order of quesadillas. Right on time.  
Friday and Saturday with Phasma meant Rey put on a tee shirt and shorts Friday night and only changed when she was getting ready to leave for the Sunday Game dinner with Finn and Poe. Effort was limited to an obligatory shower, a clean Spurs jersey she’d purchased for the season, and lightly worn sweatpants.  
Rey sat at the bar on the corner adjacent to Finn who was comfortably leaning against Poe. Said bar had four flat screens, one in each direction, so no one would miss a pass or a call in any game.

  
“Hey!” Finn and Poe echoed one another, their smiles wide and bright. Rey always found herself smiling back.

  
“So, remind me again, when does football season begin?”

  
Finn answered her first, “September. But that’s alright because I think you’ll like this more.”

  
“There are fewer people to keep track of in basketball,” Poe chimed in.

  
She didn’t really care. Rey only enjoyed sports when other people were around. She loved the camaraderie. She’d been going to Sunday dinners with Finn and Poe all season and she fed off their energy. She’d only started showing real interest the month before when she’d seen Ezekiel Elliot do his signature “feed me” hand motion, as if he was shoveling food into his mouth with both hands. The personality had shown through and she suddenly wanted that kid to win everything.

Finn quickly explained that there would only be ten people on the court at any time and that basketball was also divided up into quarters. There were violations and fouls and turnovers but Rey could hardly keep any of that straight just from hearing it. They all knew Rey would ask questions and offer her opinion whenever one arose.

The introduction began and the boys’ heads snapped to the screen. Rey watched as the Bucks took the lead for the first two quarters only to have the Spurs bounce back in the third and leave them in the dust by the fourth. Only when it looked as though the Spurs had no chance of losing their lead, did she pull out her phone and set her plan into action.

  
**Rey: Hey Kylo**  
**Rey: Just thought I’d update you, my friend and I worked up a pretty good character profile for you as well as a list of discussion topics that could be brought up during the retreat that would be helpful for you to know.**  
**Rey: I’m also getting tested in the next few days so we can swap this Thursday if all goes according to plan.**

  
**Kylo: Hello Rey :) That sounds perfect. I look forward to seeing you and what you’ve come up with.**

  
She smiled and assumed that was the closing statement of their conversation when another message came through.  
**Kylo: What are you up to on this fine Sunday evening?**

  
Finn leaned over, nudging Rey’s hand that held her phone, “What’s Phasma up to?”  
Rey looked up to meet his curious gaze. She could do this.  
“Actually,”

  
**Rey: I’m about to break the news to a few friends that I haven’t been single. Should be interesting.**

  
“I’m not talking to Phasma.”

“Oh, I just assumed ‘cause of that grin you were wearing.”

Of course he’d assume Phasma. The only other people she associated with outside of work were right beside her. That and her parents were technologically challenged so they didn’t text.  
Rey sucked in a breath and didn’t release it when she spoke.

“Yeaaah. I have a boyfriend.”

Poe did one of those short, through-the-nose chortles.

“Okay, but really,” he took a swig of his beer and when no one immediately responded he tore his attention away from the screen.

“Oh you’re serious.”

Rey nodded, her shoulders sagging with the release of breath.

Finn’s forehead creased and he pursed his lips, “You didn’t tell me you were dating anyone. You’re exclusive? You called him your boyfriend.”

“Yeah, we’re exclusive,” Rey felt a droplet of sweat bead on her brow, “We’ve been seeing each other for a little bit now.”  
Poe held the rim of his beer against his bottom lip, eyes darting between his friends.

“Well,” Finn asked, “how long is ‘a little bit’? Like two dates? Three?”

It was well rehearsed so the number slipped out easily enough.

“About three months. He'll be coming on the retreat with us.”

Finn’s jaw went slack and he looked  _disgusted_.

“What the  _hell_  Rey? You’ve been seeing the same guy for _months_  and you didn’t tell me? What made you hide him?”

  
_Three months was too long_ , she thought, but if it was any shorter she couldn’t imagine an engagement seeming like a well thought out plan. Finn would have to get over it.

  
Poe flagged down the bartender and got another round.

“I think we may need these,” he was trying (and failing) to hold back a snicker.

“I honestly wasn’t trying to hide him. You of all people should know my track record with boyfriends is abysmal. I didn’t want to really tell anyone until I knew he was for sure sticking around. And I- uh- I think he is.”  
Rey punctuated her defense with a swallow of her Smirnoff.

“Does Phasma know?”

“Only because I told her this weekend. I planned on telling you all this weekend.  _She_  was happy for me.”

Rey glared, trying her best to feel in the right about what she was doing. She remembered a time when she never lied to Finn, when he was her one true confidant she could spill all her thoughts and emotions to. That was years before though. To them, when the whole charade was over, it would be just another breakup under Rey’s belt. The story of her temporary engagement would outlast the lying. Another name to forget after a few months.

  
Poe nudged the leftover appetizer toward Finn, suggesting he shove something in his mouth before his foot.

“I’m happy for you mija. I say it’s about time.”

Finn spoke around the quesadilla in his cheek, “I’m happy for you too, dammit,” he sighed, “what’s his name?”

Rey didn’t bother holding back her smile, “His name is Kylo.”

Poe nodded and tapped on the bar with his bottle cap, “Sounds hot. I want photos.”

  
Finn gave him a disapproving side-eye but Rey flicked her phone on. She had 3 messages waiting.

  
**Kylo: Let me know how that goes**  
**Kylo: I get a profile on you too right?**  
**Kylo: Might help me get into character if I know more about you ;)**  

  
She’d have to think about that later.

Rey fumbled with her phone, nearly dropping it, trying to share the selfie he’d taken for her the other night.  
She should’ve expected it, she really should’ve.

Poe snagged the phone from her shaky grasp.

“Oh my God!”

“Wait no-””

And he flicked his damn thumb across the screen.

“Holy shit, babe, look! Is this him?” He flashed the picture of Kylo in a waistcoat at her and Finn.

  
Fuck.  
  
Rey reached for the phone but Poe was quicker. He scrolled again.

“Dude!”

Kylo in the bathtub flashed across the screen.

“Common courtesy is you don’t _fucking_  scroll, Poe!” Rey’s face was flushed and angry. Poe handed the phone to Finn whose brow furrowed.

“Rey, these are, like, professionally shot photos... Who is this guy?”

  
She blanked. Everything she’d made up the other night with Phasma was completely wiped from her memory. Whatever job she had strategically chosen for him was out the window because _who would have professional photos like those done_?

  
“You’re dating a guy that looks like he models for Men’s Health, mija good for you!”

“He’s a model!” Rey sputtered out, “Consultant. Model consultant. He’s a male model consultant.”

Poe looked considerably more impressed than his partner.  
“Well, I’ll be damned. Where the hell did you find one of those? Not in your apartment.”

They were back in territory she was familiar with. Their meeting. The movie theater. The coffee. She was golden.  
Sometime during her story Finn handed Rey her phone again.

He cut her off at the end, “Well, I’m happy for you Rey, I can’t _wait_ to meet him at the retreat. I’ve got to open the shop early tomorrow so we’ve got to get going.”  
The game had just ended, the Spurs ended ahead. Their plates were licked clean and Poe was obviously fighting off a persistent yawn.

  
She’d made it.

The first people to know about her fake boyfriend and believe her. By the end of the day Monday, everyone in the office will have heard from Poe that Rey managed to snag a guy and keep him a secret for months. She would just have to keep up with her story now that it had changed.

The trio split in two, going to their respective vehicles when Poe decided to yell across the parking lot.

“Rey! He’s coming to St. Paddy’s right?!”

 _No,_  she thought. He would not be attending the annual shitshow before the retreat. The holiday bar crawl that everyone at Skywalker Tech loved to turn into a cesspool of drunken mistakes and infamous drama. She decided to go the non-committal route.

“I’m not sure! He may be out of town!” She hollered back.

“Well tell him not to be!” to which Rey responded with an exaggerated shrug and they all finally got into their cars.

Rey fiddled with the rearview and turned the engine over so she could bask in the AC.  
“That could’ve gone much worse.”

\--

Rey’s apartment was the definition of comfort. A single bedroom on east side Austin that was nothing short of a nest with countless pillows and blankets. She entered her home and before the door clicked shut behind her, she already had one arm in her jersey pulling the hem over her head. Sneakers were kicked off and keys clattered in a painted clay dish with a tiny handprint at the bottom that once belonged to her.

Rey noticed the blinking red “1” on her landline and hit the play button. She padded into the living room half dressed, “You have … One missed messages,” and gracefully plopped onto her cushion covered couch.  
“Hey, Rey, just calling to check up on you! See how your week was and all that business. I’m sure you’re doing just fine, it’s … 8 o’clock on Sunday so you’re probably out with your friends. Mom and I are about to hop into bed so just call us tomorrow whenever you can. We love you as big as the sky and hope you have a good evening. Okay, uhm, bye!,” a few seconds pass and Rey begins to think he pocketed his phone without ending the call, “This is dad, by the way! Okay goodnight pumpkin.”

Rey smiled. Part of her wanted to know how her adoring parents would react to the week she’d had. The other part was sane enough to know: one does not simply come back from telling their parents they’re paying a large sum of money to a prostitute. For any reason.

Thinking of Kylo, she flipped onto her stomach and propped her chest and neck up with pillows so she could play on her phone with minimal muscle usage.

_So he wants to know more about me huh?_

  
**Rey: Things went great with my friends. One was already telling me to drag you to events so that’s good.**  
**Rey: As for that profile… I wouldn’t really know what to tell you that would be helpful.**

  
**Kylo: Still awake? Don’t you work in the morning?**  
**Kylo: What’s your favorite color?**

  
**Rey: I’ll have you know with coffee and a redbull I can function on a solid catnap. And yellow**

  
**Kylo: You’re too pretty to get so little beauty rest.**  
**Kylo: What kind of yellow?**

  
**Rey wanted to smack herself. He wasn’t even there and she was blushing.**  
**Rey: All yellows. Pastel. Neon. 70’s mustard yellow.**

  
**Kylo: I can’t tell if the last one was a joke or not**

  
**Rey: 🤷🏻‍♀️**

  
**Kylo: Joke will be on you when I show up to the retreat looking like an ugly banana.**  

  
“What a fucking dork!” Rey rolled into the couch burying her face in the nest of pillows. The stupid grin wouldn’t leave her face as the image of the behemoth in a sweater the shade of a moldy banana flittered through her mind.

  
**Rey: You’re ridiculous. My turn. How is your book?**

  
**Kylo: Good. I finished it. Onto the next.**  
He texted again. A picture of his hand dwarfing a beat up copy of The Hobbit.

  
**Rey: You’re a really big nerd aren’t you?**

  
**Kylo: That’s another question. It’s my turn. What do you like to do for fun?**

  
**Rey: I don’t remember agreeing to any turn rules. I like movies. Have any pets?**

  
**Kylo: And yet you abide by the unspoken rules anyway. Not in the last decade. Does a cactus count?**

  
**Rey: Only if it has a name**

  
**Kylo: Harry Potted will be thrilled to know he’s been upgraded to Pet status.**

  
**Rey: I do need to go to bed and I can’t sleep if I’m laughing so. Goodnight Kylo.**

  
**Kylo: Sweetdreams Rey :) 🌵🌵🌵**

Rey had made her way through her nightly routine during their conversation. Teeth brushed, pajamas on and alarms set. She clicked her phone onto its charger and relaxed under the blankets.

It hadn’t even been a week since Hux’s engagement announcement and she was already making moves to secure her spot as VP of Finance. _This is how a future CEO would take charge. Move forward and thrive._  
She thought about dinner and Finn and Poe’s reactions. About big hands and wet hair. About how two friends knew and now they wait for the company to know.

And right before she drifted off completely, “How do they test for STDs?”


End file.
